What made you want to book a boudoir session?

I had reached out to Katie shortly after getting engaged. At that moment I thought it would be the perfect gift for my fiance. Katie and I had gone back and forth for months and although I wasn’t feeling great about my body at the time I knew this would be the confidence boost I needed right before the wedding while also getting some pictures for my future husband. It was a win-win. About 10 months before the shoot things ended with my fiance and our wedding was called off. Katie was the first person I called, she offered to do whatever she could for me; even if it meant canceling the boudoir session. I refused. I told Katie that I wanted to continue, actually no I needed to continue and do the shoot, except this time it wasn’t going to be for any other person and instead would be a gift to myself. In the 10 months leading up to my boudoir session, I was going through a rollercoaster of emotions, transformation, and on a journey to find myself.

What would you tell someone else who is thinking about this experience but is feeling hesitant?

Do it! It’s scary but it’s also so empowering. You don’t have to do it for anyone else but yourself and if you happen to share those pictures with someone special then that’s just a bonus. I had planned this whole shoot for someone else but it became the greatest gift to myself.

Was there anything holding you back from booking your session?

Of course! I think the biggest thing for me was my confidence. I have always struggled with body dysmorphia and when I had booked my session I was probably at my heaviest, which is another reason why I chose to do the shoot in the first place. I figured if I was going to be posing in lingerie it would give me the motivation I needed in order to transform my body and prep for my upcoming wedding but in a way it was also scary because UM HELLO I’m going to be in front of a camera, in front of a stranger that I barely know, taking pictures in lingerie. But all of that changed… although I was scared shitless (and you can ask katie lol) it was one of the greatest experiences I have had.

What was your favorite part of the boudoir experience?

I remember feeling so nervous getting into my first outfit. Katie had chosen one of my lace thongs and a simple black satin tank to help me get comfortable in front of the camera at the start of the shoot. She showed me some simple poses and we were basically just taking some practice pictures, listening to some music and just having some fun. I remember she had taken probably 10 pictures at this point and she went to review them. She looked surprised and a little shocked. My nerves which had calmed by then were now heightened because what the hell did I do to make her look like that. She said Gab you have to see these pictures. She went through the few pictures that she had taken and I was shocked. I even started to tear up a little bit because I couldn’t believe that that was me. This beautiful curvy person staring back at me was me. All I could say was that’s not me and she looked at me and said “THAT. IS. YOU. and you are gorgeous! Now let’s go do this thing because I have a feeling”. By the end of the day going through those pictures and seeing the person, I had worked so hard to become I was at a loss of words. I couldn’t believe that this woman was me.

When you look at your photos, how would you describe the women you see?

After everything, I was broken. This last year was a rollercoaster of emotions, healing from heartbreak, learning that I also need to work on myself, learning how to be patient with myself, and working on becoming the person that I was always meant to become. I can see her in my pictures. I look at them often, especially on days where I’m feeling off or down. In a way, it reminds me of how much of a badass I am, how beautiful my curves are and how strong my body is. Any day I’m having an off day I reach for those pictures and remind myself that I am beautiful, confident, and resilient. Because the girl that I was a year ago would never see herself in that way. I used to look at pictures and think yeah I guess I look pretty today but now I look at pictures of myself or even in the mirror and I know I am beautiful and it no longer matters what others think of me. What matters is how I look at myself and I wouldn’t have been able to do that without Katie and this boudoir session.

Why KB Boudoir?

One word, Katie. Katie checked in on me periodically just to see how I was doing and made sure I was okay. We talked often in the weeks leading up to the shoot and it felt like I had known her a lot longer than the year and a half that I did. She made sure I felt comfortable and confident throughout the entire process. I don’t think I could have gone through with it or had felt the same way about my experience or my pictures if it was with any other photographer. I don’t know if my confidence would be where it is now without her. Although she was a small part of my healing journey, she made a huge impact on the way I see myself and I cannot thank her enough.